Happy Halloweekend everyone! 🐰🎃👻 #halloweekend
as much as i hate the idea of cold weather, New York is prettiest in the fall, don’t you think?
There are multiple ways to categorize people’s personalities.
Are you introverted or extroverted? Are you a right-brainer or left-brainer? Are you spontaneous or calculating? Are you a bunny or a cat?
In a discussion with my friend about compatibility in general, I mentioned the balance of a NEED person and a WANT person:
a WANT person is…
Someone who prioritizes their pure WANT of something over any rational reasoning
for example a want person is more likely to make impulse purchases, without thinking of the financial repercussions. More commonly, I find that WANT people fall in occupations related to art/design/music/creative services
a NEED person is…
Someone identified by someone whose logical rationing for NEED triumphs their irrational wants.
The common career path for a NEED person, is one that involves vertical thinking, as opposed to lateral, such as accounting/engineering.
It is hard to categorize someone as solely a person of want or need—it is more accurately a certain composition of each that make us up… 30% want:70% need or 25 % need:75% want.
If we were to compare ourselves to a planet, WANT would be water, and NEED would be land.
Some people would live in a world with big oceans (I guess much like the world we currently live in), while others live in a mostly land-locked globe.
So at the end of the day, is the ideal relationship, friendship or romance, between a WANT body and a NEED body?
In my personal opinion, yes.
When a NEED person can’t take the leap of faith to change their career path, because he or she is too fixated on the percentage of risk, their WANT companion can give him the needed nudge.
& when a WANT person realizes how empty his or her bank account is after rounds of impulse purchases, their NEED companion will help them get back on track financially, perhaps help them build a savings account.
So at the end of the day, what are you?
Have you ever been curious enough to take a test categorizing your personality on the archetypes assigned by Carl Jung? I remember taking this test in high school for my AP Psych class but I decided to re-evaluate myself just to reflect upon what areas I can possible improve to be the best me.
The ESFJ takes their responsibilities very seriously, and is very dependable. They value security and stability, and have a strong focus on the details of life. They see before others do what needs to be done, and do whatever it takes to make sure that it gets done. They enjoy these types of tasks, and are extremely good at them.
ESFJs are warm and energetic. They need approval from others to feel good about themselves. They are hurt by indifference and don’t understand unkindness. They are very giving people, who get a lot of their personal satisfaction from the happiness of others. They want to be appreciated for who they are, and what they give. They’re very sensitive to others, and freely give practical care. ESFJs are such caring individuals, that they sometimes have a hard time seeing or accepting a difficult truth about someone they care about.
With Extraverted Feeling dominating their personality, ESFJs are focused on reading other people. They have a strong need to be liked, and to be in control. They are extremely good at reading others, and often change their own manner to be more pleasing to whoever they’re with at the moment.
The ESFJ’s value system is defined externally. They usually have very well-formed ideas about the way things should be, and are not shy about expressing these opinions. However, they weigh their values and morals against the world around them, rather than against an internal value system. They may have a strong moral code, but it is defined by the community that they live in, rather than by any strongly felt internal values.
ESFJs who have had the benefit of being raised and surrounded by a strong value system that is ethical and centered around genuine goodness will most likely be the kindest, most generous souls who will gladly give you the shirt off of their back without a second thought. For these individuals, the selfless quality of their personality type is genuine and pure. ESFJs who have not had the advantage of developing their own values by weighing them against a good external value system may develop very questionable values. In such cases, the ESFJ most often genuinely believes in the integrity of their skewed value system. They have no internal understanding of values to set them straight. In weighing their values against our society, they find plenty of support for whatever moral transgression they wish to justify. This type of ESFJ is a dangerous person indeed. Extraverted Feeling drives them to control and manipulate, and their lack of Intuition prevents them from seeing the big picture. They’re usually quite popular and good with people, and good at manipulating them. Unlike their ENFJ cousin, they don’t have Intuition to help them understand the real consequences of their actions. They are driven to manipulate other to achieve their own ends, yet they believe that they are following a solid moral code of conduct.
All ESFJs have a natural tendency to want to control their environment. Their dominant function demands structure and organization, and seeks closure. ESFJs are most comfortable with structured environments. They’re not likely to enjoy having to do things which involve abstract, theoretical concepts, or impersonal analysis. They do enjoy creating order and structure, and are very good at tasks which require these kinds of skills. ESFJs should be careful about controling people in their lives who do not wish to be controlled.
ESFJs respect and believe in the laws and rules of authority, and believe that others should do so as well. They’re traditional, and prefer to do things in the established way, rather than venturing into unchartered territory. Their need for security drives their ready acceptance and adherence to the policies of the established system. This tendency may cause them to sometimes blindly accept rules without questioning or understanding them.
An ESFJ who has developed in a less than ideal way may be prone to being quite insecure, and focus all of their attention on pleasing others. He or she might also be very controling, or overly sensitive, imagining bad intentions when there weren’t any.
ESFJs incorporate many of the traits that are associated with women in our society. However, male ESFJs will usually not appear feminine at all. On the contrary, ESFJs are typically quite conscious about gender roles and will be most comfortable playing a role that suits their gender in our society. Male ESFJs will be quite masculine (albeit sensitive when you get to know them), and female ESFJs will be very feminine.
ESFJs at their best are warm, sympathetic, helpful, cooperative, tactful, down-to-earth, practical, thorough, consistent, organized, enthusiastic, and energetic. They enjoy tradition and security, and will seek stable lives that are rich in contact with friends and family.
Find out what your archetype is!
Have you ever realized the most meaningful conversations take place at that Sunday brunch? Maybe it’s the fresh cup of coffee that gets your brain rolling.